birthgiver

Have you ever looked at the dictionary definition of the word parent? It’s pathetic. 

“A father or a mother.'' If you take it one step further and look up father and mother, now the dictionary tells us about offspring with nothing to note about who a father or mother actually is. True to this definition when I call my youngest daughter, her phone identifies me as, “birthgiver.”

Birthgiver And Tziporah

Parent is a word with a universal understanding but it is individually defined by each family. How my parents act and look are different than how your parents act and look. They are the ones responsible for shaping our understanding of that word. 

I’ve got great parents, but not everybody does. Every familial relationship has its ups and downs, its frustrations and its joys. When I look at every parent within our own extended family, there is good, there is great and frankly, there is bad. But as parents we get to choose to continue a good cycle of parenting or break a bad cycle and show our children the way they should go. 

For most of us, parenting lasts longer than any other thing in our lives. We are parents much longer than we are not. And even though our kids change in age and growth cycle, we still parent in whatever way is possible. My husband, Bryce, and I take our parenting very seriously. And I’m not talking about that dictionary definition but what it actually means to be a parent. We respect our children, their stage in life, and try our best to give them the guidance, prayer, and help they need to keep growing and learning. 

But what does parenting have to do with our legacy? The obvious is that we leave our legacy within each of our children. They become who we are or conversely, they react to who we are by pushing hard to be our exact opposite. But at every age and stage of parenting, we get the chance to influence our children and impact them. Done well, this influence and impact teaches our children their value and the value of others. 

In my own family, each stage of parenting is still visible. How about yours? Our nephew and niece parent young children. We’re raising teens and young adults and our brothers have kids in their thirties. And finally, my parents are interacting with their own kids in their forties, fifties, and sixties. 

Just as Paul mentioned in Phillipians, by our example as parents, we are teaching our children how to fulfill this amazing God given task of valuing others and helping them grow. 

Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others. - Phillipians 2:3-4

This happens everyday for me sometimes as a parent and sometimes as a child. Everytime my parents call me, their fast approaching 50 year old daughter, to check in, they show me how to keep giving to my own children. How to show them they are loved and valued. That’s a legacy within my children that they can pass down to their own.

As a child, I hope you were given that legacy and if not, I hope that you work to change it so that your children will know what it means to parent. You will be starting a new legacy of great and loving parenting for your children, grandchildren and great grandchildren. That alone, can change your family for generations.

Searching for wisdom and asking for grace,

Jody